I’m incredibly sorry (to the very few people who probably read anything i post) but here comes another personal post. i’ve been trying to live a positive life but that’s very hard to do when you’re in an environment drowned in negativity.
i’m still living at home and struggling to get a job and struggling even more to stay positive since i keep getting shut down from jobs because of a lack of experience (which no one has the time of day to give me, by the way). and recently, i was in a bad argument with one of my siblings which has now resorted to us not speaking to each other. to be completely honest, i am okay with it…for now. i know that later on i will want to go back to being “friends” with them, but at this point in time there is no way that i can.
i am so frustrated and confused right now that i don’t even know what else to say. it seems like every time i try to do something, i am always at fault. i could be doing nothing, and i will still be at fault. and this has happened not only at home but outside with people i considered to be “friends.” i really don’t know what else i should do and the only thing i can think of is to keep to myself. to just be quiet and not say anything. so i think i will do that from now on. i became someone who was too outspoken, too “dramatic,” so i’ve decided to just keep all of my opinions and thoughts (good or bad) to myself. i will no longer have a say or an opinion about what i want or what i think is right because every time i try to say something, i am always found at fault.
thank you to anyone who read this but also i’m sorry that you even had to read it. i’m running out of blogs or social media to vent and bitch about my life so i need to hide here on wordpress. my sincerest apologies.